PERSONAL Chicago Rains On My Birthday Parade
Today is my twenty-fifth birthday. Happy Birthday to me, indeed. There are a few things to which I am accustomed on my birthday: 1) I don't work... it's three days after Christmas and I've never had to work [or go to class] on my birthday; 2) I sleep in... don't wake me up on my birthday--I'm sleeping in; 3) It's always cold and, more often than not, snowing... three days after Christmas? It's not going to be, say, raining. Well, son, times are certainly different this year... and my birthday has been different. I woke up, early this morning, to a gray sky and a misty drizzle. It's not really all that cold. The Weather Channel says that it's about 36 degrees right now. For a birthday-day that's quiet warm. So warm, in fact, that I can hardly believe it's my birthday. Perhaps this is a sign of the times, or of my age... as, taking a look at my birthday-day, I can hardly believe today is supposed to be a celebration myself. What do I mean? Here we go:
My day started by noticing dog excrement on my shoe. It had hardened and was wonderfully disgusting looking. Now I'm not sure that you know how to clean hardened excrement, but it involves making the hardened, dry substance neither hardened nor dry. This is both gross and smelly... and it makes for birthday fun! When I left my apartment to head to Chelsey's office, I noticed a smearing on the floor of the elevator. Most of the time, I love the fact that my building has dogs... it means cute doggies walking around all the time. But, apparently, it also means that poop can be on the floor of an elevator for an entire evening.
This made me hungry for a birthday lunch! And that's just what I got! Chelsey and I normally get lunch on Tuesdays and, even though my birthday didn't fall on a Tuesday, we decided to do our Tuesday lunch a day late. Our weekly Qudoba rendezvous was perhaps not a "special" backdrop for a birthday lunch, but the burrito I had was perfect: Chicken mole with guacamole... it tasted so amazing. It made me feel like the day was looking up. Actually, even the dog feces didn't put a damper on my day. My day was going pretty well, all in all, which is why I was surprised when I went to the L stop. I heard the train coming into the station while I was still walking up the first set of stairs behind a very slow, oblivious woman. As I sped to pass her, I scanned my pass and headed up the second set of stairs only to run into the mass of people leaving the train. As I was weaving my way through the people, I made it as close as three feet from the doors when they closed. I laughed. This type of crap isn't supposed to happen to people on their birthday. For those of you who don't know... missing the train like that means an eight-ten minute wait for the next one. So I stood around the train platform waiting for the next train. Boo-hoo, right? It still didn't really put me in a bad mood. Other days it might have... but not on my birthday.
My birthday wasn't going to be dampened by waiting for things. And, just to prove that statement correct, I waited at the bank. I waited at the bank for a very long time. There were only three tellers, and each one of them seemed to be doing the most complicated transactions when I entered the bank. I was easily waiting for ten minutes before the line even moved (I moved because the guy in front of me left)... and it was another ten (at least) before I got waited on.
If over twenty minutes at a bank doesn't sound like a lot in retrospect... then feel this, my 312 bitches. It's a well-known fact that the Cheesecake Factory is pretty much my favorite place to eat. Even if it's not a well-known fact, C Wage knows it... and that's all that matters. We got to the Cheesecake factory somewhere around 8 PM... and were told it would 15-30 minute wait. "No problem," we thought. Over an hour later we were finally seated. Upon seating, I was told that my beloved Fresca--the greatest beverage that only one restaurant (Cheesecake Factory) carries (that I know of)--was out. In it's place, I ordered something called the "Flying Gorilla"... which is an adult beverage consisting of banana, chocolate, ice cream, and banana liqueur. It was delicious... and tasted like dessert. I then proceeded to get my spicy chicken chipotle pasta and engage in intellectual conversation--the only kind of conversation I have. Don't buy that? Then you're right... I most probably talked about video games and strategically designed lighting fixtures. When our food arrived, it was obvious to me that my food had been prepared much faster than Chelsey's... because my food was almost room temperature. Ehh... it didn't bother me on this day. Not on this day... as it seemed nothing would bother me.
Nothing except... birthday singing. When Chelsey asked if my cheesecake could have a candle in it, I was worried that they were going to sing. I hate birthday singing in restaurants... I don't want people to make a big deal out of it. I did, however, want the candle. This year was the first year that my mom didn't get me a cake (not even to say "we got you a cake, you have to come home if you want to eat it"... which is so totally my mother)... so I wanted the candle. Thankfully, our waitress was totally cool... and brought a candle with my festively decorated piece of cheesecake and no fuss. She lit the candle, discretely wished me a happy birthday, and was on her way. Not a bad way to end my day.
Want to know what IS a bad way to end your day? Having the most psychotic cab driver ever! Granted it's not far from Michigan Avenue to my apartment, and we've made the walk before... we were just very tired and wanted to get back. Now I've heard of "crazy cabbie" stories... but they've never had the punch that they will now have after my birthday. This cab driver cut across three lanes of traffic--probably without signaling--and with other cars definitely honking at us. He accelerated faster and braked harder than anyone I've ever ridden with... and the cab fair, which STARTS at $2.25, ended up being just over $3. This means that the trip was extremely short... and about three minutes shorter than it should have been. I treated the cab ride as if we were riding an amusement park ride... and was happy to be walking on the ground when we stopped. Chelsey and I tumbled out of the cab... and kissed the ground. Nothing like a near-death experience to end your birthday with style. Happy Birthday to me.
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
PERSONAL The Times They Are A'Changin'
Have you ever woken up from being awake? Something smacks you hard enough in the face that you say to yourself "Was I just sleeping? Am I finally awake now?" Chelsey and I had a discussion this evening, after a stupid argument over something mundane (like dishes). She asked me if I would ever be happy... and I told her that, in essence, it's not in my nature to be happy. "Why?" she asked. "Because I don't feel like I deserve happiness" was my response. Now I was almost positive that my high school/college depression amounted to nothing more than teenage angst. That, once I grew up and settled down, it would all magically disappear because I would understand what was important and what wasn't. I guess, the fact is, I still don't seem to understand what's important. For instance, in the past week there have been two or three instances where I was asked to do something or go somewhere and I haven't. The reason? To be honest, I'm not sure. If hard pressed, I could only say "I didn't feel like it" or "I was too tired." Frankly, I've responded to people in that way for years now. In high school, "Wanna come over?"; "No thanks, I've got a thing." In college, "Hey we're going to a party, you should come"; "That's cool... I should study." And now in Chicago, "We're getting drinks tonight, you wanna join?"; "Nah... not tonight." And so on. These are, of course, simply examples... but they are indicative of a deeper problem.
Now, today, I find myself asking if my entire life is going to be filled with things I should have done and places I should have gone. What am I going to say on my death bed, when I look at my life and wonder why I didn't do more? That I was too tired? That I didn't feel like doing more? That no one ever pushed me to do more and I wasn't strong enough to push myself? I suppose. I suppose, in the big scheme of things, what does it matter? And hence my never-ending dilemma. Why even do those things? Why even go out, meet people, or socialize? I can't, honestly, tell if I'm having a good time while I'm out. If I go out with a group of people and we do... whatever it is that we do... I couldn't probably tell you if I was enjoying it, unless it was something, honestly, quiet and intellectually stimulating. I'm honestly very pleased to be doing a "game night" now... as my brain hasn't been able to properly flex its muscles since college. But, frankly, going out and drinking (or even staying in and drinking) will probably never appeal to me.
I'm rambling. What was my point? My point, I guess, is that I'm in a rut. An emotional rut... of which I'm not sure how to dig myself out. I'm learning what kind of person I am, what I like to do and don't like (I guess)... but I suppose what I'm saying is that I need to learn how to answer the phone--talk on the phone, too--or respond to emails. I need to learn how to force myself to do that correspondence that I don't want to do. And if you're one of the people on the other end of that seemingly one-way correspondence... all I can say is that I'm sorry and I'm working on it. Merry Christmas indeed.
Have you ever woken up from being awake? Something smacks you hard enough in the face that you say to yourself "Was I just sleeping? Am I finally awake now?" Chelsey and I had a discussion this evening, after a stupid argument over something mundane (like dishes). She asked me if I would ever be happy... and I told her that, in essence, it's not in my nature to be happy. "Why?" she asked. "Because I don't feel like I deserve happiness" was my response. Now I was almost positive that my high school/college depression amounted to nothing more than teenage angst. That, once I grew up and settled down, it would all magically disappear because I would understand what was important and what wasn't. I guess, the fact is, I still don't seem to understand what's important. For instance, in the past week there have been two or three instances where I was asked to do something or go somewhere and I haven't. The reason? To be honest, I'm not sure. If hard pressed, I could only say "I didn't feel like it" or "I was too tired." Frankly, I've responded to people in that way for years now. In high school, "Wanna come over?"; "No thanks, I've got a thing." In college, "Hey we're going to a party, you should come"; "That's cool... I should study." And now in Chicago, "We're getting drinks tonight, you wanna join?"; "Nah... not tonight." And so on. These are, of course, simply examples... but they are indicative of a deeper problem.
Now, today, I find myself asking if my entire life is going to be filled with things I should have done and places I should have gone. What am I going to say on my death bed, when I look at my life and wonder why I didn't do more? That I was too tired? That I didn't feel like doing more? That no one ever pushed me to do more and I wasn't strong enough to push myself? I suppose. I suppose, in the big scheme of things, what does it matter? And hence my never-ending dilemma. Why even do those things? Why even go out, meet people, or socialize? I can't, honestly, tell if I'm having a good time while I'm out. If I go out with a group of people and we do... whatever it is that we do... I couldn't probably tell you if I was enjoying it, unless it was something, honestly, quiet and intellectually stimulating. I'm honestly very pleased to be doing a "game night" now... as my brain hasn't been able to properly flex its muscles since college. But, frankly, going out and drinking (or even staying in and drinking) will probably never appeal to me.
I'm rambling. What was my point? My point, I guess, is that I'm in a rut. An emotional rut... of which I'm not sure how to dig myself out. I'm learning what kind of person I am, what I like to do and don't like (I guess)... but I suppose what I'm saying is that I need to learn how to answer the phone--talk on the phone, too--or respond to emails. I need to learn how to force myself to do that correspondence that I don't want to do. And if you're one of the people on the other end of that seemingly one-way correspondence... all I can say is that I'm sorry and I'm working on it. Merry Christmas indeed.
Thursday, December 22, 2005
HOLIDAY NEWS A Festivus For The Rest Of You
According to Wikipedia (the most knowledgeable site on the net), Festivus is tomorrow (December 23rd). Festivus, a fictitious non-denominational holiday, was first brought to national exposure by a Seinfeld episode in 1997. Okay, it was basically created by Seinfeld in 1997. The Wikipedia article is interesting... check it out. The best part of Festivus, in my opinion, is the Airing of Grievances. I love that idea. I love it so much, in fact, that I type on the internet about my grievances. Then I bake cookies, curl in a ball, and eat them while I cry myself to sleep. Ahh the life of a high-profile actor.
According to Wikipedia (the most knowledgeable site on the net), Festivus is tomorrow (December 23rd). Festivus, a fictitious non-denominational holiday, was first brought to national exposure by a Seinfeld episode in 1997. Okay, it was basically created by Seinfeld in 1997. The Wikipedia article is interesting... check it out. The best part of Festivus, in my opinion, is the Airing of Grievances. I love that idea. I love it so much, in fact, that I type on the internet about my grievances. Then I bake cookies, curl in a ball, and eat them while I cry myself to sleep. Ahh the life of a high-profile actor.
PERSONAL Another Waste Of Your Time
So I spend a lot of time on my friend Katy's blog. Partially because she now updates more often than I do and partially because of my unholy man-crush (what?). Regardless, I saw that she had a list of interesting questions posted and I thought I'd answer them definitively... just so no one can argue the true answers (Some gender pronouns have been changed to protect my innocence):
1. If you fell in love with a wonderful man with the last name spelled S.C.H.I.T.Z, would you keep your own last name? I suppose it depends on how well he treats me. If he's a good man, I would love to be a Schitz... just like him.
2. If you could have any song writer write you a love song, who would you choose? Weird Al Yankovic... or, better yet, Randy Newman.
3. If you could have any song playing while you danced with a woman that you just realized is the love of your life, what would it be? "Let's Get It On", or "Sexual Healing"
4. What movie/literary character best represents you? For years I thought I was Rob Gordon from High Fidelity... but now I just think I'm MacGyver (MacGyver's cool. Don't die MacGyver) but could see myself ending up being Mr. Holland... from the Opus fame.
5. If you could have acted in any movie, which would you choose? Clue. I think it would have been fun. Or OOH! One of the new Star Wars movies. I always wanted to have a Jedi action figure of myself.
6. If you had to marry one of your guy friends, who would you marry? Robert. He's cute and he really listens to me. I mean... I'm straight.
7. If you could act in a movie with any co-star, who would it be? Tom Hanks. Hands down. Tom Hanks. I would learn more about the craft of acting on that one movie than I could after years in the business. Tom. Hanks.
8. What actor would you have play you in a movie about your life? We've been down this road. I think I'm still going with Sean Austin. I DO say 'Mr. Frodo' all the time.
So I spend a lot of time on my friend Katy's blog. Partially because she now updates more often than I do and partially because of my unholy man-crush (what?). Regardless, I saw that she had a list of interesting questions posted and I thought I'd answer them definitively... just so no one can argue the true answers (Some gender pronouns have been changed to protect my innocence):
1. If you fell in love with a wonderful man with the last name spelled S.C.H.I.T.Z, would you keep your own last name? I suppose it depends on how well he treats me. If he's a good man, I would love to be a Schitz... just like him.
2. If you could have any song writer write you a love song, who would you choose? Weird Al Yankovic... or, better yet, Randy Newman.
3. If you could have any song playing while you danced with a woman that you just realized is the love of your life, what would it be? "Let's Get It On", or "Sexual Healing"
4. What movie/literary character best represents you? For years I thought I was Rob Gordon from High Fidelity... but now I just think I'm MacGyver (MacGyver's cool. Don't die MacGyver) but could see myself ending up being Mr. Holland... from the Opus fame.
5. If you could have acted in any movie, which would you choose? Clue. I think it would have been fun. Or OOH! One of the new Star Wars movies. I always wanted to have a Jedi action figure of myself.
6. If you had to marry one of your guy friends, who would you marry? Robert. He's cute and he really listens to me. I mean... I'm straight.
7. If you could act in a movie with any co-star, who would it be? Tom Hanks. Hands down. Tom Hanks. I would learn more about the craft of acting on that one movie than I could after years in the business. Tom. Hanks.
8. What actor would you have play you in a movie about your life? We've been down this road. I think I'm still going with Sean Austin. I DO say 'Mr. Frodo' all the time.
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
PERSONAL Two Major Time-Wasters... Rolled Into One!
I have a MySpace account... and I wanted to post two things I saw on the (stupid) bulletin board. The first is kind of fun and it's a quick one to do if you're board. In the long-history of Google games, you simply put "(your own name) looks like" and see what Google says you look like. For example, Google says: "John looks like he has a lot of feelings;" "John looks like a Rumanian refugee;" "John looks like the cover of your book to me;" and, my personal favorite, "John looks like a monstrous spined robot with a large amount of weapons." Neato, huh? No? Boring? Fair enough... let's do a survey then. I LOVE these!
27 questions that no one would ever think to ask (including questions not even asked by this survey):
1. When you look at yourself in the mirror in the morning, what's the first thing you think? I'm big! That fortune-teller machine really works!
2. How much cash do you have on you? Right now? $0.00. But my wallet is over there *points* It doesn't have much money on it either.
3. What is a word that rhymes with "TEST"? Breast. It's true. Look it up.
4. Favorite planet? Saturn... because of the moon that looks like the Death Star (Mimas).
5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone? My friend Adam... sorry Adam.
6. What is your favorite ring on your phone? The MacGyver theme song
7. What shirt are you wearing? FSU Criminal Justice (Go Bulldogs!)
8. Do you "label" yourself? Yes. I am Seamus McAwesome, Mayor of KickAssVilleTown.
9. Name the brand of your shoes you're currently wearing? I'm not wearing shoes but, if I was, they would be Adidas
10. Bright or Dark Room? For what? I LOVE the fact that my apartment gets a lot of natural light. But, if I'm developing pictures, that's actually NOT good.
11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you? Rebecca is someone I don't know. She wanted to add me and I thought "why not? I need friends" That's one of the problems with MySpace. And she, most probably, deleted number 12... because I didn't.
13. What were you doing at midnight last night? Signing Christmas cards. For reals peoples... for reals.
14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say? "U R late. Bring snacks"
15. Where is your nearest 7-11: The one they tore down just in time for me to take Laura there to get a Slurpee? That one's torn down. I think the next closest one is on LaSalle, though.
16. What's a saying that you say a lot? "I've never seen that before, officer"
17. Who told you they loved you last? MC Dubs. Aww...
18. Last furry thing you petted? Come on, gross... there are children reading this.
20. How many rolls of film do you need to get developed? Mike Ditka's moustache! I almost forgot! *Runs to car... one hour later* Okay. To answer your question, none.
21. Favorite age you have been so far? 21 was actually a really good year for me. Remember me with hair?... don't strain yourself thinking too hard.
22. Your worst enemy? Whomever stole numbers 12 and 19! And Murdock.
23. What is your current desktop picture? The Lagoon Nebula. It's breath-taking.
24. What was the last thing you said to someone? "Thank you" (it was a transaction!)
25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to change a major regret? The million dollars should take care of that regret and the subsequent abortion... with a little money to spare.
26. Do you like someone? Is this survey for twelve-year-olds? If so, are they single? I mean... gross? But, yes, I do "like" someone.
27. The last song you listened to? "Run Away" -Staind
I'm done! Wasn't that fun?! NO?! Too bad... you read it anyway! Hooray!
I have a MySpace account... and I wanted to post two things I saw on the (stupid) bulletin board. The first is kind of fun and it's a quick one to do if you're board. In the long-history of Google games, you simply put "(your own name) looks like" and see what Google says you look like. For example, Google says: "John looks like he has a lot of feelings;" "John looks like a Rumanian refugee;" "John looks like the cover of your book to me;" and, my personal favorite, "John looks like a monstrous spined robot with a large amount of weapons." Neato, huh? No? Boring? Fair enough... let's do a survey then. I LOVE these!
27 questions that no one would ever think to ask (including questions not even asked by this survey):
1. When you look at yourself in the mirror in the morning, what's the first thing you think? I'm big! That fortune-teller machine really works!
2. How much cash do you have on you? Right now? $0.00. But my wallet is over there *points* It doesn't have much money on it either.
3. What is a word that rhymes with "TEST"? Breast. It's true. Look it up.
4. Favorite planet? Saturn... because of the moon that looks like the Death Star (Mimas).
5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone? My friend Adam... sorry Adam.
6. What is your favorite ring on your phone? The MacGyver theme song
7. What shirt are you wearing? FSU Criminal Justice (Go Bulldogs!)
8. Do you "label" yourself? Yes. I am Seamus McAwesome, Mayor of KickAssVilleTown.
9. Name the brand of your shoes you're currently wearing? I'm not wearing shoes but, if I was, they would be Adidas
10. Bright or Dark Room? For what? I LOVE the fact that my apartment gets a lot of natural light. But, if I'm developing pictures, that's actually NOT good.
11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you? Rebecca is someone I don't know. She wanted to add me and I thought "why not? I need friends" That's one of the problems with MySpace. And she, most probably, deleted number 12... because I didn't.
13. What were you doing at midnight last night? Signing Christmas cards. For reals peoples... for reals.
14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say? "U R late. Bring snacks"
15. Where is your nearest 7-11: The one they tore down just in time for me to take Laura there to get a Slurpee? That one's torn down. I think the next closest one is on LaSalle, though.
16. What's a saying that you say a lot? "I've never seen that before, officer"
17. Who told you they loved you last? MC Dubs. Aww...
18. Last furry thing you petted? Come on, gross... there are children reading this.
20. How many rolls of film do you need to get developed? Mike Ditka's moustache! I almost forgot! *Runs to car... one hour later* Okay. To answer your question, none.
21. Favorite age you have been so far? 21 was actually a really good year for me. Remember me with hair?... don't strain yourself thinking too hard.
22. Your worst enemy? Whomever stole numbers 12 and 19! And Murdock.
23. What is your current desktop picture? The Lagoon Nebula. It's breath-taking.
24. What was the last thing you said to someone? "Thank you" (it was a transaction!)
25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to change a major regret? The million dollars should take care of that regret and the subsequent abortion... with a little money to spare.
26. Do you like someone? Is this survey for twelve-year-olds? If so, are they single? I mean... gross? But, yes, I do "like" someone.
27. The last song you listened to? "Run Away" -Staind
I'm done! Wasn't that fun?! NO?! Too bad... you read it anyway! Hooray!
Friday, December 16, 2005
PERSONAL It's That Time Of Year Again...
The time of year when the pressure is on the most... and every game counts. I speak, of course, of Fantasy Football Playoffs. As we sit right now, entering the playoffs in both of my head-to-head leagues... I've won both regular season titles with identical 10-4 records. I find this ironical in that the players on my teams don't have very much overlap. Additionally, in my one points-based league, I'm leading by over a hundred points with only three weeks left. But this is where Fantasy Football, for me, gets tricky. The playoffs are a "win or go home", "lose and you're out" situation... and I have, historically, lost and gone home very early in the playoffs. Most of the time, my good players stop performing near the end of the year, when injuries have caused them diminished offensive production. The result is that I lose in the first round of the playoffs to someone with a crappy record and (in my opinion) crappy players. This is the most frustrating part... and makes me vow, every year, that I'm not going to play again next year. I, of course, always come back to it--shaking and cold, like a junkie needing a fix. This year, unfortunately, looks to be no different, as I have key quarterbacks and running backs probable or questionable for this weekend... and I will no doubt lose horribly.
PERSONAL Game Night!
Speaking of games, this past Wednesday night was the first of what I hope will be a regular game night at Katy's. I was re-introduced to my love of CatchPhrase... which is fantastically fun, if you have a system in place saying that, if the buzzer goes off while passing, THIS happens (whatever "this" might be). If you don't have that rule, then things get competitive and stupid and you might as well just do it over. CatchPhrase has got to be one of the ultimate drinking and/or group games. Additionally, we played a game called Apples to Apples which claims to be a game of hilarious comparisons. It did not disappoint. I laughed out loud multiple times, especially since everyone who was there was so clever and funny. I think it got to the point where people knew which card I had placed because I wouldn't laugh at my own. Also there was tons of homemade chocolate-chip cookies that were delicious to the max. It was a lot of fun... and it was the first thing I've done, since my move to Chicago, that reminded me of college. It made me miss it so.
The time of year when the pressure is on the most... and every game counts. I speak, of course, of Fantasy Football Playoffs. As we sit right now, entering the playoffs in both of my head-to-head leagues... I've won both regular season titles with identical 10-4 records. I find this ironical in that the players on my teams don't have very much overlap. Additionally, in my one points-based league, I'm leading by over a hundred points with only three weeks left. But this is where Fantasy Football, for me, gets tricky. The playoffs are a "win or go home", "lose and you're out" situation... and I have, historically, lost and gone home very early in the playoffs. Most of the time, my good players stop performing near the end of the year, when injuries have caused them diminished offensive production. The result is that I lose in the first round of the playoffs to someone with a crappy record and (in my opinion) crappy players. This is the most frustrating part... and makes me vow, every year, that I'm not going to play again next year. I, of course, always come back to it--shaking and cold, like a junkie needing a fix. This year, unfortunately, looks to be no different, as I have key quarterbacks and running backs probable or questionable for this weekend... and I will no doubt lose horribly.
PERSONAL Game Night!
Speaking of games, this past Wednesday night was the first of what I hope will be a regular game night at Katy's. I was re-introduced to my love of CatchPhrase... which is fantastically fun, if you have a system in place saying that, if the buzzer goes off while passing, THIS happens (whatever "this" might be). If you don't have that rule, then things get competitive and stupid and you might as well just do it over. CatchPhrase has got to be one of the ultimate drinking and/or group games. Additionally, we played a game called Apples to Apples which claims to be a game of hilarious comparisons. It did not disappoint. I laughed out loud multiple times, especially since everyone who was there was so clever and funny. I think it got to the point where people knew which card I had placed because I wouldn't laugh at my own. Also there was tons of homemade chocolate-chip cookies that were delicious to the max. It was a lot of fun... and it was the first thing I've done, since my move to Chicago, that reminded me of college. It made me miss it so.
NATIONAL NEWS Have You Seen THIS??!
A woman in New York, in a burning building, tossed her three-month-old baby out of her third-story apartment to try to save her son. Here is a link to see the video... it is amazing. The baby doesn't seem real, as it flops around in the man's hands. Both the child and the mother are safe, incredibly. I don't know what kind of strength/fear it would take to toss your child out of a window, but thankfully it all worked out. And what's the moral of this story? The moral is that nothing bad will happen if you toss your children out of windows.
NATIONAL NEWS Same Sex Classes Raises Test Scores; But At What Price?
A middle school in Columbus, Georgia, has had a year-long experiment in same sex classrooms. The verdict? Test scores and grades are up, write-ups for wrong-doings are down. This is all well and good... but weren't we, as a country, working AWAY from segregating? I thought we were supposed to be this great mixing pot for ideas, cultures, and peoples. Shouldn't these children be presented with the opposing views that the opposite sex bring to discussion? And what happens to these kids when they go to high school? Don't we all know how sexually frustrated the Catholic school children (especially the girls) become after years of gender segregation? If same sex classrooms really work, should we keep the genders separate throughout high schools? What happens when those children all go to college then? Yicks! Scandals!
I know that I'm making this out to be a "slippery slope" argument when, perhaps, it shouldn't be--but think about this: It's important that these middle-schoolers pay attention in class because, if they don't, they'll never know about important things like the Mole bridge or the Donner Party. Where would I be without that amazing knowledge? Probably still unemployed. Is there really anything that anyone is learning in middle school that makes this necessary? And shouldn't we be making, nay forcing, kids this age to be working in groups and learning to work in diverse groups with all manor of people? The answer? Yes... group work, the bane of my existence.
NATIONAL NEWS Teens Think Jesus Is Cool... Or Something
Skateboarding? Swallowing live goldfish? Rock concerts? What do these things have in common? They're all Christian activities. This ABC news story tells us just that. Teens today are latching onto Christianity, as the article says, as if were 'a fad.' It also says that Christian events are a safe environment for activities free from alcohol, drugs, and sex. While I don't think Jesus would condone swallowing goldfish, I don't think there's anything wrong with trying to make religion interactive and fun.
But, there's a youth minister in Naperville who wrote an article entitled "Jesus is Not Cool." This minister said that Jesus' message is getting lost amidst the tattoos, piercings, and rock music. I think there is certainly a very thin line between giving teens a safe environment, and believing in the certain doctrines behind the safe environment. I don't suggest to have the answer... but want's so wrong with a safe, drug-free environment being just that? I know that the people who set up these events have an ulterior motive (to get teens interested in religion)... but why can't their motive be, instead, to set up a healthy environment for all--Christians and non-Christians? Isn't that the Christian thing to do? Shouldn't it be?
A woman in New York, in a burning building, tossed her three-month-old baby out of her third-story apartment to try to save her son. Here is a link to see the video... it is amazing. The baby doesn't seem real, as it flops around in the man's hands. Both the child and the mother are safe, incredibly. I don't know what kind of strength/fear it would take to toss your child out of a window, but thankfully it all worked out. And what's the moral of this story? The moral is that nothing bad will happen if you toss your children out of windows.
NATIONAL NEWS Same Sex Classes Raises Test Scores; But At What Price?
A middle school in Columbus, Georgia, has had a year-long experiment in same sex classrooms. The verdict? Test scores and grades are up, write-ups for wrong-doings are down. This is all well and good... but weren't we, as a country, working AWAY from segregating? I thought we were supposed to be this great mixing pot for ideas, cultures, and peoples. Shouldn't these children be presented with the opposing views that the opposite sex bring to discussion? And what happens to these kids when they go to high school? Don't we all know how sexually frustrated the Catholic school children (especially the girls) become after years of gender segregation? If same sex classrooms really work, should we keep the genders separate throughout high schools? What happens when those children all go to college then? Yicks! Scandals!
I know that I'm making this out to be a "slippery slope" argument when, perhaps, it shouldn't be--but think about this: It's important that these middle-schoolers pay attention in class because, if they don't, they'll never know about important things like the Mole bridge or the Donner Party. Where would I be without that amazing knowledge? Probably still unemployed. Is there really anything that anyone is learning in middle school that makes this necessary? And shouldn't we be making, nay forcing, kids this age to be working in groups and learning to work in diverse groups with all manor of people? The answer? Yes... group work, the bane of my existence.
NATIONAL NEWS Teens Think Jesus Is Cool... Or Something
Skateboarding? Swallowing live goldfish? Rock concerts? What do these things have in common? They're all Christian activities. This ABC news story tells us just that. Teens today are latching onto Christianity, as the article says, as if were 'a fad.' It also says that Christian events are a safe environment for activities free from alcohol, drugs, and sex. While I don't think Jesus would condone swallowing goldfish, I don't think there's anything wrong with trying to make religion interactive and fun.
But, there's a youth minister in Naperville who wrote an article entitled "Jesus is Not Cool." This minister said that Jesus' message is getting lost amidst the tattoos, piercings, and rock music. I think there is certainly a very thin line between giving teens a safe environment, and believing in the certain doctrines behind the safe environment. I don't suggest to have the answer... but want's so wrong with a safe, drug-free environment being just that? I know that the people who set up these events have an ulterior motive (to get teens interested in religion)... but why can't their motive be, instead, to set up a healthy environment for all--Christians and non-Christians? Isn't that the Christian thing to do? Shouldn't it be?
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
NATIONAL NEWS The Deep-Fried Twinkie That Broke The Camel's Back
Here is an article from Yahoo!News today. The article is about a new medical study that concludes that TV advertising is promoting "unhealthy food choices" and are contributing to childhood obesity. The conclusion made by the study is that, if the advertising and "junk" food industry doesn't clean up their act, Congress should step in and force companies to advertise healthier choices. I have two major problems with this study:
1) Aren't we talking about the same advertising that also causes anorexia and bulimia because you and I will never be that thin or attractive? Can't we just make a blanket statement that advertising has ceased to be about informing the general public about new products and has, instead, become a harbinger of physical and mental disorders? Is it advertising's job to NOT leave thousands of otherwise healthy self-esteems decimated in it's wake? I don't think so. For as long as people have had better stuff than other people, we've all (Americans) felt the need to flaunt it. Or, perhaps the better question which is more ridiculous than even my over-the-top rhetoric... what would a company like Hostess be able to advertise? I mean, just think of a company which makes exclusively foods which one would consider "junk." If forced to advertise healthy alternatives, what would companies like those advertise? They would be forced, wouldn't they?, to come up with healthy alternatives... even if they are a successful "junk food" business. If Americans are supporting a company that makes exclusively junk food, is the real problem here the advertising of that company?
2) I may not know the MOST about politics in the universe... but wasn't the GOP supposed to be about giving power to state and local governments? But, in the past 8 years, we've seen an influx of new powers giving to the federal government from everything from transportation (wisely) to Major League Baseball or the BCS (ridiculously). Do we REALLY need the ineptitute of congress to say "Hey, every once in a while, eat a carrot."? I suppose it could be argued that, yes, that is the role of the government... to maintain the health and well-being of its citizens. But shouldn't that be the role of the parents? And, I already know what you're thinking "Parents all ready have a lot to deal with", etc... but my stance has been the same for years: It is just impossible to raise a child in a two-parent (or one-parent, for that matter) environment if both parents work. A child needs constant care and supervision. This is, obviously, almost impossible under our current social system. And latchkey/after-school programs are not the answer. One teacher for 20-30 kids does not work. My solution? Old people. You're G--amn right. For almost a decade we've heard the Baby Boomers pre-emptively bitch about "what am I going to do when I retire?"... well I have your solution right here. What could possibly be a better cure-all for the two most annoying demographics (the extremely young and extremely old) than to put them together somewhere (somewhere out of sight). Hell, we could shuttle those little bundles of... joy... to retirement homes after school, and let them spend some real quality time with their elders. They'll learn respect, history, and come away with a much greater appreciation for their health. This way the elderly aren't being ignored and today's youth aren't being bombarded with advertising (except for the advertising that comes on during Matlock).
Here is an article from Yahoo!News today. The article is about a new medical study that concludes that TV advertising is promoting "unhealthy food choices" and are contributing to childhood obesity. The conclusion made by the study is that, if the advertising and "junk" food industry doesn't clean up their act, Congress should step in and force companies to advertise healthier choices. I have two major problems with this study:
1) Aren't we talking about the same advertising that also causes anorexia and bulimia because you and I will never be that thin or attractive? Can't we just make a blanket statement that advertising has ceased to be about informing the general public about new products and has, instead, become a harbinger of physical and mental disorders? Is it advertising's job to NOT leave thousands of otherwise healthy self-esteems decimated in it's wake? I don't think so. For as long as people have had better stuff than other people, we've all (Americans) felt the need to flaunt it. Or, perhaps the better question which is more ridiculous than even my over-the-top rhetoric... what would a company like Hostess be able to advertise? I mean, just think of a company which makes exclusively foods which one would consider "junk." If forced to advertise healthy alternatives, what would companies like those advertise? They would be forced, wouldn't they?, to come up with healthy alternatives... even if they are a successful "junk food" business. If Americans are supporting a company that makes exclusively junk food, is the real problem here the advertising of that company?
2) I may not know the MOST about politics in the universe... but wasn't the GOP supposed to be about giving power to state and local governments? But, in the past 8 years, we've seen an influx of new powers giving to the federal government from everything from transportation (wisely) to Major League Baseball or the BCS (ridiculously). Do we REALLY need the ineptitute of congress to say "Hey, every once in a while, eat a carrot."? I suppose it could be argued that, yes, that is the role of the government... to maintain the health and well-being of its citizens. But shouldn't that be the role of the parents? And, I already know what you're thinking "Parents all ready have a lot to deal with", etc... but my stance has been the same for years: It is just impossible to raise a child in a two-parent (or one-parent, for that matter) environment if both parents work. A child needs constant care and supervision. This is, obviously, almost impossible under our current social system. And latchkey/after-school programs are not the answer. One teacher for 20-30 kids does not work. My solution? Old people. You're G--amn right. For almost a decade we've heard the Baby Boomers pre-emptively bitch about "what am I going to do when I retire?"... well I have your solution right here. What could possibly be a better cure-all for the two most annoying demographics (the extremely young and extremely old) than to put them together somewhere (somewhere out of sight). Hell, we could shuttle those little bundles of... joy... to retirement homes after school, and let them spend some real quality time with their elders. They'll learn respect, history, and come away with a much greater appreciation for their health. This way the elderly aren't being ignored and today's youth aren't being bombarded with advertising (except for the advertising that comes on during Matlock).
Monday, December 05, 2005
SPORTS ESPN/ABC/Disney... Sucks?
Last week I was sent to a blog called Every Day Should Be Saturday. The post in particular was a fascinating/hilarious one: 52 Reasons Why ESPN/ABC/Disney Sucks. If you have the time, check it out. If you don't have the time, allow me to point you to the most interesting points on that list.
#6 Sportstainment!--I've talked about this already. I don't understand why a specialized TV Channel (like ESPN or MTV) feels the need to do things besides why they became a popular TV Channel. Why ESPN should make sports movies or sports reality shows?... I don't know. I am one of the thousands of people who would (and does) willingly watch the SAME EPISODE of Sportscenter back-to-back. Stick with what got you there... that's what I say!
#17 That Damn "Twins" song!--You remember that catchy, but slightly annoying, twins song that Coors used to sell beer? Well two (or three) years later, those bastards are still singing that same song... every week, with different lyrics, set to ESPN's NFL highlights. Something like "I... love... the leader of the Pack... lying on his back" makes me want to pull the thumbs off of the young gentlemen who sing that song.
#30 Woody Paige!--I went through a month or two period when I watched Cold Pizza every morning. The show I blasted when it first came on the air, they changed the format and made it an interesting show. But now, after two straight months of "Professor Screwloose" and hearing Skip Bayless yell the most asinine fallacies (he yells because he was ignored as a child... as such, he's learned to become "abrasive"), I'm sick of that show--watching Mike and Mike in the Morning instead.
And, the worst of all, #19 Making the story!--The item they use is Terrell Owens. But I pose this to you: LeBron James. Yes, LeBron lived up to the hype. Thank God, ESPN says. They put this guy's high school basketball games on national television. What if James was a bust? They made him the next best thing before he was even in the league. Turns out they might have been right... but where does reporting what's next meet making what's next? Where is the line? ESPN blurs that line all the time... without checks or balances, I might add. ESPN has no national competition (some might say Fox Sports... but Fox is definitely regional)... so there's no one to hold ESPN accountable if they get something "wrong." Accountability is key!
Last week I was sent to a blog called Every Day Should Be Saturday. The post in particular was a fascinating/hilarious one: 52 Reasons Why ESPN/ABC/Disney Sucks. If you have the time, check it out. If you don't have the time, allow me to point you to the most interesting points on that list.
#6 Sportstainment!--I've talked about this already. I don't understand why a specialized TV Channel (like ESPN or MTV) feels the need to do things besides why they became a popular TV Channel. Why ESPN should make sports movies or sports reality shows?... I don't know. I am one of the thousands of people who would (and does) willingly watch the SAME EPISODE of Sportscenter back-to-back. Stick with what got you there... that's what I say!
#17 That Damn "Twins" song!--You remember that catchy, but slightly annoying, twins song that Coors used to sell beer? Well two (or three) years later, those bastards are still singing that same song... every week, with different lyrics, set to ESPN's NFL highlights. Something like "I... love... the leader of the Pack... lying on his back" makes me want to pull the thumbs off of the young gentlemen who sing that song.
#30 Woody Paige!--I went through a month or two period when I watched Cold Pizza every morning. The show I blasted when it first came on the air, they changed the format and made it an interesting show. But now, after two straight months of "Professor Screwloose" and hearing Skip Bayless yell the most asinine fallacies (he yells because he was ignored as a child... as such, he's learned to become "abrasive"), I'm sick of that show--watching Mike and Mike in the Morning instead.
And, the worst of all, #19 Making the story!--The item they use is Terrell Owens. But I pose this to you: LeBron James. Yes, LeBron lived up to the hype. Thank God, ESPN says. They put this guy's high school basketball games on national television. What if James was a bust? They made him the next best thing before he was even in the league. Turns out they might have been right... but where does reporting what's next meet making what's next? Where is the line? ESPN blurs that line all the time... without checks or balances, I might add. ESPN has no national competition (some might say Fox Sports... but Fox is definitely regional)... so there's no one to hold ESPN accountable if they get something "wrong." Accountability is key!
Saturday, December 03, 2005
PERSONAL I. Am. Superman.
Not only am I bullet-proof (don't test that theory), but I look like the beloved actor who at one time portrayed the man of steel. Why the cockiness (besides me just being me)? I was sent to MyHeritage by my friend Katy... and uploaded my headshot. My headshot is a 71% match to Mr. Christopher Reeves. Although, to be completely honest, it's not a match with the young, Superman-playing Christopher Reeves... it's a 71% match to old, handicapable Christopher Reeves. A picture of me smiling is a 59% match to tennis-stud Roger Federer (which makes sense since we're both Belgian). And the most ridiculous picture of me--mouth open and eyebrow up--from my "headshot photo shoot" is a 60% match with Eminem.
MC Dubs, on the other hand, had a 70% match with Natalie Portman and a 64% match with Cate Blanchett. Jimmy Shy, coincidently, 50% match with William Shatner. That's hilarious. Head to the site and start downloading so that you, too, can see Mr. Andrew Groggs as a 43% match with Shirley Temple. True... odd but true.
Not only am I bullet-proof (don't test that theory), but I look like the beloved actor who at one time portrayed the man of steel. Why the cockiness (besides me just being me)? I was sent to MyHeritage by my friend Katy... and uploaded my headshot. My headshot is a 71% match to Mr. Christopher Reeves. Although, to be completely honest, it's not a match with the young, Superman-playing Christopher Reeves... it's a 71% match to old, handicapable Christopher Reeves. A picture of me smiling is a 59% match to tennis-stud Roger Federer (which makes sense since we're both Belgian). And the most ridiculous picture of me--mouth open and eyebrow up--from my "headshot photo shoot" is a 60% match with Eminem.
MC Dubs, on the other hand, had a 70% match with Natalie Portman and a 64% match with Cate Blanchett. Jimmy Shy, coincidently, 50% match with William Shatner. That's hilarious. Head to the site and start downloading so that you, too, can see Mr. Andrew Groggs as a 43% match with Shirley Temple. True... odd but true.
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