We've hit one week of unemployment!
Yes, now it's technically Wednesday and I got laid off a week ago. I say laid off, because it allows me to pause and just say that I got laid... a week ago. This is great because we're talking a very long time since I could say that. But I digress... what have I been up to? How goes the job hunt? you ask... it's been non-existent, I respond. I'm still trying to catch up on my writing (obviously), reading, and miscellaneous "house" chores. As soon as I get my apartment in order (which will hopefully be sometime later this week), then I'll start looking around for jobs. But I'm honestly still too busy trying to catch up from all the free time that I lost at my stupid job.
I've also been thinking a lot about going back to school. I have a couple of possibilities of what I would go into... but my dad has started "pushing" again for Law School... and I think I'm actually going to take the LSAT, just to see how well I could do. I'm interested to see if I really have what it takes... and my work "fiasco" has got me interested in being able to use the law to screw good, honest people over like Andrea did (let this be the last time I use her name on this blog: if I refer to her in the future, she shall be called Ms. Johnson). Let's talk about something happier, shall we?
Ken called me from Maryland on Sunday. He was on his way overseas, to an undisclosed location. He keeps telling me not to worry about him because he's "very good" at what he does. That's nice. I'm not worried about him screwing something up... I'm worried about the appalling number of "friendly fire" casualties that the United States seems to have whenever we have a "conflict." I don't know the real numbers, and I don't want to know... let's just say that there are a lot of people over 'there', with a lot of firearms, and I'd rather have Ken state-side where he can bug me about football or tell me about a cool new game or call me pathetic for not talking to women. *shakes head* God bless Ken Huhtala... keep him safe.

What can I do about all this 'military/unnecessary conflict' loot? Well, step one is filling out the Absentee Ballot I just got in the mail. That's right, kiddies... and they make it easy to vote for all Republicans, too (take THAT Rhea! I'm going to vote for Republicans so that all our tax money goes to the military and the wealthy so that the Johnsons will have a properly equipped Police force to deal with me and my dangerous backpack!). I don't know where that came from... but I did want Rhea to know I got my absentee ballot, so she can lay off my freakin' case.
Speaking of that wonderful human being, Rhea and Jean sent me care package! Aren't they awesome (and isn't it awesome that I say "Rhea and Jean" to spite everyone who isn't Jean)? They wanted to send me a nice package of care now that I'm poor and unemployed (they move quickly). They sent me a fabulous package and I'm going to thank them as soon as I've got some free time at night (or this weekend) to call them. Quick sidenote: my phone bill was almost double what I normally pay this past month. If I was still at The Stone, I would ask them to pay at least half of it.

Tonight I watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind... and I wouldn't mind getting Kirsten Dunst erased from my mind. Ha! But, seriously, when I think about everyone I've dated, I have to wonder if I would like them to be erased from my mind. If you're reading this, and you're Laura, I don't mean you. But there are plenty of memories from "happier" times which are now just painful. I'm sure everyone has painful memories floating around in their head. Sometimes, it probably would be easier to move on if those "happy" memories were gone. Would I do such a thing? Probably. It's frankly taken me a long time to want to open myself up to the kind of indescribable pain that walks hand-in-hand with an indescribable love. Honestly, I don't even think I'm there yet. Someone asked me if I was interested in "having a girlfriend" again, and I responded that I wouldn't mind having someone to see things with, to go to movies with, and to spend time with. Then I realized that at no point did I mention actually falling in love or being in love. This is where I say it's "too soon", even though it's probably chronologically not too soon, and then you say "you'll never know until you try" and I say "I don't really want to try" and you say "well then we're talking about something entirely different, aren't we?" and I say "what is THAT supposed to mean?" and you say "well, what do you think it means?" and I say "you think you're better than me?" and you say "What? No... that has nothing to do with anything. I just thought...", "You thought, did you? I don't pay you to think!" And so forth. Where was I? Ah yes... I was erasing the memories of someone from my head. I think I would probably be a little like Jim Carey in that, as they were pulling the memories from my head... I would do everything I could to get them to stop. But what would make me happier? Being able to look back on happy times that have long since passed... Christmas trees, Listerine, and cemeteries... but having them squeeze my heart with every thought? Or just not having them up there? It's funny to think how someone can change your life in just a short time... a few months seem like years, and you don't know what your life would be like if you had never met that person. This memory eraser thing is just the ticket you'd need to know what your life would be like if you hadn't met that person. You'd be different... overnight you'd be different.