Ten "Onion-Style" Headlines!
Hey... here's a list of 10 'Onion-style' headlines that I wrote last night in my writing class. I would've published this earlier... but I was tired. Leave me alone! (or leave me a comment! How cool has this been so far!?? SO COOL!) Anyway... here's my list of headlines... I thought it was funny.

1. Irony finally formally defined when leader of Boy Scouts comes out of closet
2. Tourists say "Fuck Florida... we're going to Mars"
3. Johnny Depp's new movie "Small, Independent, and Weird Film" opens this weekend
4. Ice Cream cures fever of old woman
5. Prison box of cigarettes says "I feel like the bitch"
6. Little League World Series pitcher excited about voting for first time
7. Roommate exclaims "We've run out of eggs!"
8. Smurfs use cheetoes to beat Vanity to death
9. New study shows M&Ms do melt in hand
10. Customer shocked by low price of Denny's Grand Slam breakfast

Yeah... I came up with that list in about 15 minutes... which I'm really proud of. Leave me alone... it's good for the amount of time in which I had to do it!